Partners
Commercial team named 'World's Best at Turning £1 into £8'
Our partnerships department outperformed every club in Europe for nine consecutive seasons. The secret? A very generous friend.
28 Sep 2026 · Sham FC Media (satire)
Sham FC's commercial department has been honoured at the fictional Global Alchemy Awards after converting £1 of partner money into £8 of reported revenue, a conversion rate unmatched since medieval times.
"People ask what our secret is," said Head of Partnerships Dame Priscilla Ledger-Wright (also fictional). "Hard work, relationship-building, and a friend who pays the other seven quid. Mostly the last one."
The club's famous 'tagged sum' model allows partners to pay a small base fee, while the remainder of the headline number arrives from an entirely different direction. Our partners describe the experience as 'suspiciously affordable'.
Interested in becoming a partner? Visit our Partners page. Remember: if anyone asks, you paid the big number.
This article is satire. All named people are fictional, and so is Sham FC. See our disclaimer and sources.
